Where I've Been and What Happens Now...

My word, has it only been 203 days? Where has the time gone?

Where I've Been...

As with any good hiatus, cultivating a sense of mystery regarding my absence is just as important as actually telling you what I've been up to, besides, y'know, existing. In fact, to say that my disappearance triggered waves upon waves of fan theories and speculative emails would be a significant understatement. A false understatement... but an understatement, nevertheless. Had you going there, didn't I?

Right, enough twists worthy of a Sherlock finale - Here's the real deal. I have been stranded on an island. With little money to my name and only my wits to keep me alive, I have been able to build a simple, yet enjoyable, life for myself here on the remote isle of... Great Britain! YES, I got you again! Have some of that, you- wait, where are you going? Ok, I'll behave, sorry.

So, right off the bat, I've written a veritable vat-load of scripts in the last 6 months, and whilst I won't bore you with too many specific details, the short headlines include:

- A Sitcom Pilot (Longlisted by BBC Writersroom).
- 32 Radio Sketches.
- Spec Scripts for "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" and "Brooklyn Nine Nine".
- The Opening 10 Pages of a Sci Fi Feature.
- A Full Length Sci Fi Drama Pilot (for BBC Writersroom's latest submission window).
- Lots of little ideas in my "mind notebook".
- Numerous Outlines for my next BIG Feature Film Project.

Cue generic "writing" picture.

Now, before this gets all too self-congratulatory, let's all remember that quantity isn't always indicative of quality, and while this looks like a fair amount on paper, some of those projects have only been through a few drafts, and are still arguably a way off "completion". But that's the incurable itch of writers - we'll never fully be satisfied. So instead I'm giving myself a relatively hollow pat on the back for at least writing something during this blogular hiatus.

It hasn't all been scribbling notes and yelling at Celtx though - I've been doing some other real world stuff too, I swear! A podcast which I write for and host, "A Little Bit Racey", got nominated for a UK Podcasters Award for "Best Comedy" - a tremendously proud achievement of ours, which, in part, is thanks to our lovely audience. Aside from spending months drumming up the votes on social media, we put in an appearance at the event itself, and, despite ultimately not being the victors, our resolve to take the show to the next level has increased tenfold, culminating in the impending release of some Christmas Specials before the New Year comes a knockin' (check us out on social media, I'm becoming aware that this seems like a story for another time).

Which brings me to my DAY JOB ("Ahh-ahhh-ahhhhh"), for lack of a better term. Yes, the rumours I just invented are, in fact, true - I'm totally a part time script reader. I have become the "man" that this blog has repeatedly lampooned, parodied and completely misunderstood in the past. But hey, I'm going on record here and saying that script reading is a noble profession. Aside from the occasional bouts of rage and utter confusion, I'm able to pass on (hopefully) valuable feedback to writers who want and/or need it. From time to time, I'll even get the same script to read again, months later, and to see a marked improvement genuinely fills me with an inner warmth normally reserved for extreme dental surgery. So, let's talk about what this all means for this blog's rebirth...

What Happens Now

It occurs to me that, having read scripts crafted by writers from all different walks of life, that a large number of budding storytellers could do with some crucial "do's" and "don'ts" from the bloke on the other side of the world who makes a living out of judging them. Naturally, these guidelines will definitely need to be presented in a fun, not-at-all-ripped-from-Buzzfeed, format, and employ a fine blend of meaningless rambles, useless advice and embittered commentary. Truthfully, bringing this blog back with a more "script reader" focus is just as much for me as it is for any of you, but who knows? You just might learn something while you laugh at how delusional my new position of "power" has made me.

Make no mistake, this is still "Anti-Scriptwriting", not "Anti-Scriptreading", and over the coming months, I've got a lovely variety of topics and fun little articles for y'all to sink your eyes into. So stick around, friend - let's properly catch up, yeah?

Some housekeeping before I sign off today. The blog will now run ONCE a week, with new articles every Saturday (typically around midday). During the blog's previous run, I became increasingly anxious of plugging bi-weekly on Facebook and Twitter to all my friends / followers (that makes it sound like I have way more than I actually have), and I'm aware that sort of overbearing need for attention can become a little intoxicating. Therefore, over the next week, look out for dedicated "Anti-Scriptwriting" pages on both of those social platforms, and be sure to give them a "like" or "follow" if you're one of the awesome people who wants to keep posted!

Finally, at the end of the year, I'll be doing a Q+A blog, taking all of your questions regarding script writing, script reading or just script anything, and answering them in a way that only I can (i.e. trying to be funny for a bit, before failing and just telling you straight). So, be sure to leave ANY questions you may have (even if you already know the answer and just want to know my specific thoughts) on this page, or via Facebook comments, messages, Tweets, texts, emails, carrier pigeons, smoke signals or whatever means you feel is best to reach me.

Much love - It's great to be back x

James Cottle, a Scriptwriting Mega-Scholar™, is now a real world Freelance Writer, in between intense bouts of Script Reading. Follow him on Twitter @Jxmxsc, "like" the Anti-Scriptwriting page on Facebook, and share this blog if you want his opinions on your work to be completely unbiased.