A Sample Script Report For The Anti-Scriptwriting Blog

Script Reports are a peculiar beast. They have the unenviable task of summarising the strengths and weaknesses of a script in a manner that will be satisfying for the original writer, whilst still being forthcoming enough to tell them where their "magnum opus" really falls down. There isn't time to get into every detail, but without specific examples, the feedback won't feel like it's related to this script in particular. In summary, it's all a rather precarious balancing act, and one I feel like the unfamiliar amongst you should bear witness to. So, I've decided to write a script report for the one thing I know for a fact you've all been reading for the last few weeks... This blog.

Also, watch out for my behind the scenes author's notes in itallics, if only to explain why I've said that horrible thing in that particularly horrible way.

Script Report Commence! - Note: I've never started a report like this, but I feel I will from now on.

Plot Summary: - Note: I never normally include headings at all, to be honest, so this is purely for your benefit.

Following his days of formal education in the world of scriptwriting, James Cottle begins to feel as if his accumulated knowledge on the topic is going to waste, firing off pointless job applications and spending too much time watching Frasier repeats. He sets up a reasonably successful blog, initially as an excuse to share some opinions on superhero movies that wouldn't fit into a Facebook Status, but soon it becomes a thoughtful outlet on discussing all things writing-related. However, after six months, the bells of unemployment start to chime, so James halts the blog in order to focus on regular script reading work. Almost a year later, he returns to the blog he loves, now with a whole new set of skills that he wants to share with the world.

Note: All of that is true, although I'm still very much embroiled in watching Frasier repeats.

Positives:

The Anti-Scriptwriting blog certainly follows a unique premise - a writing blog that eschews conventional advice in favour of a more light-hearted (if occasionally aggressive), fun approach to the world of scripts - Note: Sometimes, a cheeky back-handed compliment in brackets might be necessary, as if to say, "take this with a pinch of salt, buddy". Hidden amongst these gags at the expense of Michael Bay and people who write "We see...", however, are some genuinely interesting insights, subtly teaching the reader without them realising - Note: stick in the word "genuinely" if you're afraid of not sounding sincere. What results is almost akin to a complex character study, where James' emotional state and mindset vary from week to week, painting a picture of a man who has seen some things, but also wouldn't mind seeing those things again - Note: I'm aware I treat script reading like I was in 'Nam sometimes, and for that, I'm sorry, but also not sorry.

Note: OK, brace yourself for the gloves to come off.

Negatives:

Note: I usually kick off with a paragraph of general "story" notes.

Despite all this, the blog does unfortunately fall down in a few places - Note: lower them down gently with a sentence that screams "disappointment". The constantly shifting tone does make for an inconsistent reading experience, with some blogs passing by without so much as a joke, and others desperately trying so hard to be funny that the resulting message becomes diluted - Note: BAM! Hit them with failure on multiple fronts. It becomes hard for us to root for James when he spends entire articles trying to be unlikeable, despite his natural charisma and charm - Note: Not my words, just the words of this fictional reader persona I've created today. As a result of this inconsistency, a number of plot holes and contradictions arise, where you seem to almost deliberately undermine points you've made in previous articles - Note: Yeah, I've done this a few times now.

Note: The next paragraph is typically revolving around dialogue, and most of the time, there's usually far too much to say within the confines of just the one.

The primary issue with the way you communicate your points is that you simply take far too long explaining the reasoning behind a short heading that frankly says it all - Note: Sometimes I have written a heading and thought "I genuinely have nothing more to say about this, but I'mma talk anyway". Sentences like "INSERT EXAMPLE HERE" and "INSERT EVEN WORSE EXAMPLE HERE" lessen the impact by over-labouring the point, rather than keeping the blog moving forwards. There are also a number of instances of exposition, where it feels like you're telling us that exposition is bad, without showing us that it's bad - Note: Just like in this sentence. Ensure each line is in keeping your character's "voice", and try to end your sentences on the most impactful or humorous moment to keep the reader wanting more - Note: Boobies.

Note: The final paragraph in the negatives section typically revolves around scene description, formatting, and spelling/grammar if applicable. Naturally, I'm incredible at all of these, so try not to pay too much attention.

Aside from the over-reliance on cheap gags and long, drawn-out sentences (Note: i.e. dialogue in an actual script report), there needs to be a stronger dependence on visual storytelling throughout the blog, in order to allow the reader to immerse themselves in the world you've created - Note: no matter how much you highlight the word "visual", most writers still don't seem to get it. Paint a clearer picture with your vocabulary, rather than hopping from point to point with disconnected "jokes" that fail to maintain a consistent narrative - Note: highlighting the word "jokes", on the other hand, is the ultimate kick in the teeth which they will NOT forget. Formatting wise, try to use pictures that actually correlate with the point you're making, and refrain from mixing up itallics, capital letters and underlining to emphasise your points - Note: It's probably worth you ignore that previous note. And the following picture for that matter.

Conclusion:

Note: Remind them what you thought was good, before crushing their dreams with the reasons you thought their life's work fails, and what they should focus on improving.

Overall, the Anti-Scriptwriting blog has a great deal of potential (Note: "potential" is the ultimate back-handed compliment term), along with some strong character and insights that leave a lasting impression - Note: Lasting impressions = not always a good thing. However, in future articles, you need to focus more on creating a cohesive experience for the reader, avoiding intentional contradictions, stretching out important points and improving the timing (Note: Boobies) and maturity (Note: Uhhh...) of your jokes. Hopefully then, the blog will be ready to start impressing people in higher places - Note: always end on a glimmer of hope, no matter how much they do or do not deserve it.

Score: 5/10 - Note: Some agencies will go with the "Pass", "Consider" or "Recommend" options, whilst my present work dictates a score out of 10 is required. The majority of scripts I read will be 5 and below, sadly, although I've never had to give a 1, no matter how unacceptable they've been. Only given out a single 9, as my highest score too. Either way, I think we can all agree, there's still room for improvement with this blog, right? Or have I been too harsh? PLEASE VALIDATE ME. ISN'T THAT WHAT SCRIPT REPORTS ARE REALLY FOR, ANYWAY?!

James Cottle, a Scriptwriting Mega-Scholar™, is now a real world Freelance Writer, in between intense bouts of Script Reading. Follow him on Twitter @Jxmxsc, "like" the Anti-Scriptwriting page on Facebook, and share this blog if you want his opinions on your work to be completely unbiased.