Which Oscar Nominated Film Are You Accidentally Writing?

Good ideas, much like bad ideas, are a constant. You’ll find yourself unable to identify which category your idea falls into at first, let alone whether or not someone has already thought of that idea. But don’t fret! With this handy guide, judged against the apparent “best” movies of the last 10-12 months, you’ll be able to see if the core of your story idea is actually similar to something that’s already out there, and subsequently scrap the whole thing if need be. You can thank me later for crushing your dreams.

1) Is your Film based on a True Story?

If Yes, go to Question 2.
If No, go to Question 3.
If Sort Of, go to Question 2 anyway you indecisive fool.

2) Does your Film focus on a Time of War or Immense Political Change?
If Yes, go to Question 4.
If No, go to Question 5.
If Sort Of, go to Question 5 and evaluate your life.

3) Is your Film a Fantasy or Science Fiction Film?
If Yes, go to Question 6.
If No, go to Question 7.
If Sort Of, go to Question 7 and quit blending genres.

4) Is your Protagonist a Soldier in the Film?
If Yes, go to Question 8.
If No, go to Question 9.
If Sort Of, go to Question 9 and stop endangering honest men.

5) Does your Protagonist  have an Abusive Mentor?
If Yes, go to Question 10.
If No, go to Question 11.
If Sort Of, go to Question 10 and lay off the poor kid.

6) Is your Film going to be Animated?
If Yes, go to Question 12.
If No, go to Question 13.
If Sort Of, go to Question 13 and stop relying on CGI.

7) Is your Protagonist slightly Disturbed in the Head?
If Yes, go to Question 14.
If No, go to Question 15.
If Sort Of, go to Question 15 and don’t come back.

8) Does your Protagonist Get Taken Prisoner At Any Point?
If Yes, go to Result Number 1.
If No, go to Result Number 9.

9) Is your Protagonist White?
If Yes, go to Result Number 2.
If No, go to Result Number 10.

10) Does your Film involve any Physical Combat?
If Yes, go to Result Number 3.
If No, go to Result Number 11.

11) Is your Protagonist Still Alive Today (in Real Life)?
If Yes, go to Result Number 4.
If No, go to Result Number 12.

12) Does your Film Lean More Towards Science Fiction?
If Yes, go to Result Number 5.
If No, go Result Number 13.

13) Is your Film a Musical?
If Yes, go to Result Number 6.
If No, go to Result Number 14.

14) Is your Film a Thriller?
If Yes, go to Result Number 7.
If No, go to Result Number 15.

15) Is your Film focussed on a Family?
If Yes, go to Result Number 8.
If No, go to Result Number 16.

The Results:

Naturally, this process is all incredibly reductive, so if your movie hasn’t conformed to this basic quiz, then head to the very bottom of the results to Number 17, where you will find your prize. Otherwise, be sure to comment with your result at the bottom!

1) You’re Writing Unbroken!

Nominations: Best Cinematography, Best Sound Mixing, Best Sound Editing

2) You’re Writing The Imitation Game!

Nominations: Best Film, Best Lead Actor, Best Director, Best Supporting Actress, Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Original Score, Best Film Editing, Best Production Design

3) You’re Writing Foxcatcher!

Nominations: Best Lead Actor, Best Director, Best Supporting Actor, Best Original Screenplay, Best Makeup and Hairstyling

4) You’re Writing The Theory of Everything!

Nominations: Best Film, Best Lead Actress, Best Lead Actor, Best Adapted Screenplay, Original Score

5) You’re Writing Big Hero 6!

Nominations: Best Animated Feature Film

6) You’re Writing Into The Woods!

Nominations: Best Supporting Actress, Costume Design

7) You’re Writing Nightcrawler!

Nominations: Best Original Screenplay

8) You’re Writing Boyhood!

Nominations: Best Film, Best Director, Best Supporting Actress, Best Supporting Actor, Best Original Screenplay, Best Film Editing

9) You’re Writing American Sniper!

Nominations: Best Film, Best Lead Actor, Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Film Editing, Best Sound Mixing, Best Sound Editing

10) You’re Writing Selma!

Nominations: Best Film, Best Original Song

11) You’re Writing Whiplash!

Nominations: Best Film, Best Supporting Actor, Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Film Editing, Best Sound Mixing

12) You’re Writing Mr. Turner!

Nominations: Best Original Score, Best Cinematography, Best Costume Design, Best Production Design

13) You’re Writing How to Train Your Dragon 2!

Nominations: Best Animated Feature Film

14) You’re Writing Interstellar!

Nominations: Best Original Score, Best Sound Mixing, Best Sound Editing, Best Production Design, Best Visual Effects

15) You’re Writing Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance)!

Nominations: Best Film, Best Lead Actor, Best Director, Best Supporting Actress, Best Supporting Actor, Best Original Screenplay, Best Cinematography, Best Sound Mixing, Best Sound Editing

16) You’re Writing The Grand Budapest Hotel!

Nominations: Best Film, Best Director, Best Original Screenplay, Best Makeup and Hairstyling, Best Original Score, Best Cinematography, Best Costume Design, Best Film Editing, Best Production Design

17) You’re Writing The Lego Movie!

Nominations: Best Original Song

James Cottle, after studying Scriptwriting for 4 years, is now an embittered real life freelance writer, and seeks to unlearn everything he knows. But he needs your help... Follow him on Twitter @Jxmxsc and share this blog to help spread his anarchic plight for reform amongst the writing masses.